Just Quote

beyond the imagination

So true Funny Quotes!!!

#1 

*WHEN DUKAAN WALA SAYS 10,000 

 AND MOM SAYS 1800*

 ME: MUMMU PITWAOGI KYA!

#2

 SHADIYON ME MILNE WALI FREE KI 

 PANIPURI KABHI TASTY NAHI HOTI!

#3

 IN CHILDHOOD: CHIRI URI, KAWWA URA

 NOW: NEEND URI, CHAIN URA

#4 

 HONESTLY I CAN’T BE A DOCTOR!

 JO KHUD BAHAR KA KHAATA HAI VO PATIENT KO 

 “BAAHAR KA MAT KHAAO” KESE BOLEGA…

#5

 ME: YE CHAPTER CHORR DETA HUN, EXAM ME NAHI AAYEGA.

 CHAPTER: BETA TU KAL MIL!

#6

 HINDI: MAUSI KHAIYE NA.

 MARATHI: KHAMOSHI.

#7

 *IGNORING SOMEONE*

 PERSON – HEY, ARE YOU IGNORING ME?

 YES, AND PLEASE DON’T TEXT ME..(WRONG WAY)

 NEAH, YARR NET SLOW HAI THODA(RIGHT WAY)

#8

 AMBANI

 BILL GATES

 FIR AATE HAI WO JO BOLTE HAI KI “MEIN TO APNE GHAR ME EK   CHOTA SA BHI KAAM NAHI KARTA!”

#9

 ME: MAI LATE NIGHT PARTY PE JA RAHA HU

 DAD: YEH SAB HAMARE GHAR NAHI CHALTA

 ME: ISLIYE BAHAR JAA RAHA HU

#10

 MERI DOST LADKI HAI.

 LEKIN SACH BOLUN TO LADKIYON WALI EK BHI CHEEZ NAHI   USMEIN.

 MARD HAI WOH MARD!




#11

 REASONS WHY I DON’T LIKE FAMILY FUNCTION:

 1) KISKO NAMASTE KARNA H KISKO PER CHUNA HAI SMJH NAI AATA

 2)LINE B KISPE MAROGE HARR KOI RELATIVE HAI.

#12

 BAATEIN KISI AUR SE, CRUSH KISI AUR PE.

 DIL ME LOI AUR HAI, SHAADI KISI AUR SE.

#13

 RELATIVE: AUR BETA KAISE HO?

 ME: BAS TABIYAT ZARA KHARAB HAI.

 BRO: DIMAAG BHI.

 SIS: SHAKAL BHI.

 MOM: HAMARI KISMAT BHI.

#14

 TU BETA HAI KISI AUR KA TUJHE MELAA BACHAA KEHKAR 

 BULATAA KOI AUR HAI.

#15

 SURAT KALI HO TO CREAM LAGAI JAATI HAI,

 AUR KARTUTEIN KAALI HO TO MOBILE PAR CODE!!!

#16

 THING WHICH WAKES YOU UP IN THE MORNING

 ALARM

 ENOUGH SLEEP

 MAJBOORIAN

#17

 RALATIVE: BETA, WHAT DO U DO ON WEEKENDS?

 ME: WATCH CRIME PETROL.

 RELATIVE: OHH.. SO YOU LOVE CRIME SHOWS?

 ME: NO! I LOVE HOW PEOPLE KILLED THEIR RELATIVES..

#18

 ME: MUMMY SHARMAJI KI BETI BHAG GAI..

 MUMMY: HAAN TO..

 ME: AAJ NHI KAHOGI, SHARMJI KI BETI SE KUCHH SIKH!!

#19

 MARRYING A KNOWN PERSONALITY MAKES YOU A “COUPLE”

 MARRYING AN UNKNOWN PERSONALITY MAKES YOU AN “INDIAN   COUPLE”!!

 #20

 MUSHKIL KAAM

 BAHUT MUSHKIL KAAM

 DOST KI BEIZATII KARNE SE KHUD KO ROKNA




#21

 KOI GALTI HO GAI HO TO GHAR AAKAR 3-4 JUTTE MAAR LIYA KARO   HARAMKHORO, 

 PAR LADKI KE NAME SE FAKE ID BANAKAR AADHI RAAT KO MERI   BHAVNAO SE MAT KHELA KARO!!

#21

 [WHATSAPP]

 OTHERS – CHAT, MAKE PLANS, FACTS, PICS, FUN VIDEOS, ETC ETC..

 INDIA – SAACHE HINDU HO TO SHARE KARO.

#22

 *JAB LADKI KUTTE WALA FILTER USE KARTI HAI*

 ME: AWWW… U R LOOKING SO CUTE

 *JAB LADKA KUTTE WALA FILTER USE KARTA HAI*

 ME: ARRE KUTTE WALA FILTER USE KARNE KI KYA ZARURAT THI,   TERA NORMAL PIC HI KAFI HAI KUTTE JAISA DIKHANE KE LIYE!!

#23

 BURE WAQT ME FRIENDS DILASA DETE HAI AUR

 BEST FRIEND MAZAQ UDHATE HAI…

#24

 BHAGWAN KA DIYA SAB KUCH HAI. TOLIYA HAI, MAGGA HAI, BALTI   HAI, PAANI HAI…

 MAGAR NAHANE KI HIMMAT KAHA SE LAAU?

#25

 TRAVELLING WITH FRIENDS MAKES YOU FEEL COOL

 TRAVELLING WITH FAMILY MAKES YOU FEEL LIKE A COOLIE…!!

#26

 *ME TRYING TO COOK*

 *5 MIN LATER*

 MUMMY!! SAB KE SAB JALTE HE MUJHSE..

#27

 PADHAI KA 5 MIN KA BREAK KAB 2 GHANTE ME CONVERT HO JATA   HAI, PATA HI NAHI CHALTA!!

#28

 THERE ARE 3 TYPES OF PEOPLE:

 1) JO FOLLOW BACK NA KARNE UNFOLLOW KAR DETA HAI

 2) JINKO FOLLOWING/FOLLOWERS SE KOI FARK NAI PADTA

 3) “BHAI TUNE ABHI TAK MERE KO FOLLOW BACK NI KIYA HAI” BOL   BOL KE FOLLOW  BACK KARVANE VAALE!!

#29

 SHE: ABKI BAAR DIWALI KA KYA PLAN HAI?

 JAISE PICHALI BAAR DUBAI NAHI GAYE THE, WAISE HI  IS SAAL BHI   PARIS NAHI JAYENGE.




#30

 WHEN YOUR SIBLING LOOKS GOOD

 -ACCHE LAG RAHE HO (NO)

 -INSAAN LAG RAHE HO (YES)

#31

 KUCH KIYE BINA HI THAK JAANA, YE BHI EK HUNAR HAI DOSTO..

#32

 SUBAH JALDI UTH KAR KAAM KARNE MAIN JO KHUSH HAI NA,..

 WOH MUJHE NAHI CHAHIYE!!

#33

 IS’T IT SAD THAT WE ARE PROBABLY THE LAST INDIAN GENERATION   JISKI ARRANE MARRIAGE HOGI!!!!

#34

 JIS TARAH PUBG KE MAPS KO YAAD RAKHA USS TARAH GEOGRAPHY   KE MAPS KO YAAD RAKHTE TOH BETA AAJ TUM TOPPER HOTE..

#35

 OTHERS: HEY SIRI

 AJAY DEVAGAN: K SIRI

#36

 ME IN MY SASURAAL:

 SAAS: YEH TUMHARI MAA KA GHAR NAHI HAI.

 ME: TOH YEH APKI BHI MAA KA GHAR NAHI HAI.

#37

 BESTFRIEND: MAIN ACCHI HU NA?

 ME: DAAG TOH ACCHE HOTE HAI!!

#38

 [TAKING AN UBER]

 FOREIGNERS: TURN ON THE RADIO PLEASE.

 INDIAN: OR BHAI, KITNE PAISE KAMA LETE HO?

#39

 LOGON KE COUSINS KYA DANCE KARTE HAI SHAADIYON PAR

 YAHAAN MERE COUSINS “TU KAR TU KAR TU KAR” KARTE KARTE   THOO THOO KARWA DETE HAI..

#40

 *WHEN COUPLES GO TO BED THEY SAY*

 UK: SWEET DREAMS HONEY.

 USA: GOOD NIGHT DARLING!

 INDIA: CYLINDER BAND KIYA?? GATE LOCK KIYA??




#41

 ME: AANKH, KAANOON OR VICHAAR KO ENGLISH ME KYA BOLTE   HAI?

 SHE: EYE LAW VIEW

 ME: I LOVE YOU TOO!!

 ** FAS GYI BC**

#42

 2013: MATRU KI BIJLI KA MANDOLA

 2018: SONU KE TITU KI SWEETY

 2050: RAMU KE CHACHA KI BUA KE BETE KI DULHAN HUM LE   JAYENGE!!

 

Funny Quotes on Friendship

#1

We are best friend. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up… after I finish laughing.

#2

1 + 1 is two,… Our dosti is ‘True’,…

2 + 2 is four,… Our dosti is ‘More’,…

3 + 3 is six,… Our dosti is ‘Fix’,…

4 + 4 is eight,… Our dosti is ‘Great’,…

#3

Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.

#4

Best friends don’t let you do stupid things alone.

#5

One glass two straws – FRIEND

One glass one straws – LOVERS

One glass one slap, go buy your own – BEST FRIEND

#6

BEST FRIENDS : You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You fall, I fall too because I was laughing so hard.

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